Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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