Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Randomize