Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
