i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
