She went from zero to smokin in five shots
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
