i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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