you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
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