At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
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