So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
