Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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