i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
