"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize