Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
