i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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