you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
