Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
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