Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize
