you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
You need a sexual gate keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize