Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Acid is not a monday night drug
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Randomize
