hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Even my vagina gasped.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
