There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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