Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Randomize
