Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
