Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
