Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I'm chasing vodka with french fries.

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(201): I'm chasing vodka with french fries. http://tfl.nu/5e4z

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(773): View more from Illinois

the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu

(773): View more from Illinois

which is why it's clearly superior

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(773): the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu (773): which is why it's clearly superior http://tfl.nu/iahv

Replies (26) Good night (2785) Bad night (488)
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(440): View more from Ohio

Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.

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(440): Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan. http://tfl.nu/6sdz

Replies (8) Good night (3358) Bad night (662)
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(931): View more from Tennessee

Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.

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(931): Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person. http://tfl.nu/od1c

Replies (46) Good night (6914) Bad night (749)
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(443): View more from Maryland

He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M

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(443): He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M http://tfl.nu/4y0g

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(718): View more from New York

you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...

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(718): you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water... http://tfl.nu/djs2

Replies (43) Good night (1366) Bad night (6403) Order T-Shirt
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(815): View more from Illinois

Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.

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(815): Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome. http://tfl.nu/075s

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(914): View more from New York

I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds

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(914): I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds http://tfl.nu/eevd

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(681): View more from West Virginia

Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.

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(681): Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most. http://tfl.nu/7o83

Replies (12) Good night (2018) Bad night (677) Order T-Shirt
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(772): View more from Florida

I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.

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(772): I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do. http://tfl.nu/7vxu

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(440): View more from Ohio

I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"

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(440): I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found" http://tfl.nu/rmaa

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.

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(412): I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again. http://tfl.nu/ottt

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(513): View more from Ohio

Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup

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(513): Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup http://tfl.nu/jbl9

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(614): View more from Ohio

Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.

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(614): Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro. http://tfl.nu/qoaz

Replies (2) Good night (570) Bad night (131)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.

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(202): Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there. http://tfl.nu/rixv

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