I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
