Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
