Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
