i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
