we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
