what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Is Oprah even human
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize