I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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