love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
