jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
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I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
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I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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