please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
