You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
