i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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