I hope mine doesn't look like that
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I enjoy the company of your penis
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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