Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize