Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
