Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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