I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize