If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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