I'm so fucking centered right now
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
