You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
