Can Purell be used as lube?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
