I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
