Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
sex in a hospital.. check
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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