how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize