let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
