Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
